What’s The Best Way to Teach Boys to Value Girls?

 

A friend recently posed a question on Facebook: What strategies have you used to teach middle-school boys about valuing the worth of girls/women?

My Answers:

Teach boys self-worth and how to value themselves, first, and as an extension, how to value others.
Teach both physical and emotional intimacy. A lot of these things can and should start before middle school, but middle school is better than never.
Teach them the realities of how women are mistreated/undervalued in society (pay disparity, job inequality, etc.), and why it’s important to advocate for those with less power.
Explicitly teach them to value their bodies and women’s bodies via age-appropriate sex education, which includes discussing the realities of the porn industry and how it affects our valuing of sex and women. This also includes explicitly teaching consent (CLICK HERE for pointers on NOT Raising Rapists).
Ensure parents are on board with what you’re teaching and that they’re reinforcing these messages at home and especially in the media their kids are exposed to.
Teach boys to hold others, especially other males, accountable for their sexism and/or misogyny.

The time to be a leader isn’t later. The time to lead is now. Their ability to lead is now. During the preadolescent years, parental influence is paramount. But during the middle-school years, we tend to see a shift in how children internalize parental vs. peer values, so the earlier parents can model and make their ideals meaningful, the better. Likewise, the more we can help adolescents hold each other accountable on some of these issues, the better, because their peer groups become considerable influencers as they age.

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Finding Your Purpose and Saying NO

You’ll find your purpose by seeking, studying, and serving. Once you do, your “No” to good things will make room for your “Yes,” to God things. Listen below and subscribe to Pastor Kymone Hinds’ Ideas to Life podcast, available on iTunes, SoundCloud, Google Play, and more.

God Remembers You

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But God remembered Noah… {Gen. 8:1}. In your barrenness, God remembers; in your brokenness, God remembers. He remembered Hannah, He remembered Rachel, He remembered Abraham, and God remembers you! If you feel forgotten by God, know that as with Hagar, He is still the God who sees you and remembers His promises to you, even after the wildest storms in your wilderness places. {1 Sam. 1:19; Gen. 30:22; 19:29; 16:7}

GOD REMEMBERED…some of my favorite words in the Word! A God who knows all, yet we’re told several times that He remembers…remembers your pain, remembers your purpose, remembers His promises. God has not forgotten about you; He remembers.

Christ Died for Your Sins and Your Shame

 

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Christ didn’t just die for your sins. He died for your shame, for the ugliest things you’ve experienced and the ugliest things you’ve done. His punishment paid for your peace and proves your immeasurable worth. Resist the voices that tell you otherwise. {Heb.12:2; Isa. 53:5}

You’re no less loved by the Healer if your wounds are self-inflicted. ~Beth Moore

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How to Hear God’s Voice and Not Your Own (or Others’)

i hear voicesHow do I know it’s GOD speaking, and not ME speaking? How do I know it’s the voice of GOD, and not the voice of the enemy? These are valid questions because 2 Corinthians 11:14 says, “…Satan disguises himself as an angel of light…” which means it will sometimes be difficult to discern between the voice of God and the voice of Satan.

In John 10:4 & 5, Jesus says His sheep know His voice, and they follow Him, but they also do NOT follow the stranger and run away from him because they do NOT know the stranger’s voice. That means, it’s not enough just to know the Shepherd’s voice, but we must also be unacquainted with the voice of the enemy!

Adam and Eve spent time hearing God’s voice in face-to-face encounters, but it wasn’t enough just knowing what God said. Adam and Eve knew God’s words, but they entertained the enemy! Likewise, our Bible helps us to know what God said! But it’s NOT enough to just know your Word. You have to defamiliarize yourself with the voice of the enemy!

2min 30 second VIDEO with brief story: https://www.facebook.com/DrDeeKnight/posts/10154856340226492

Finding Peace When Life Throws a Punch and Your Emotions Take a Hit

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P E A C E does NOT mean your emotions won’t take a hit when life throws a punch. It just means you don’t have to come out of character when you’re hurt, angry, etc., and that if you do, you rest knowing you have an Advocate with the Father {1 John 2:1}. Getting to know the Word (Jesus) is so integral to this kind of peace. Getting to know your Word (the bible) is so integral to getting to know Jesus. The Word anchors us. I have quite a hold on a peace beyond my understanding, or perhaps that peace has quite a hold on me.

After the gut punch life threw me a couple weeks ago, I realized I’m deeply entrenched in a season of my life where I know my enemy has already done the worst he could do, and he failed. I know he failed because I’m still here, and you’re still standing, and hallelujah, the grave is still empty! Crucifixion Friday was literally the worst our enemy could do, and he failed! We serve a Risen Savior!

Our Risen Savior is now our great High Priest, the one who is able to feel with us. He knows when life hits you, your emotions will sway up and down some. It’s okay for your emotions to be flexible to your life experiences, to be disappointed, sad, lonely, or angry. But the peace of God, which surpasses our understanding {Philippians 4:7}, meets you at the place where you decide your faith will NOT follow your feelings, so that if your feelings are wavering, your faith is still secure because it’s anchored in God’s faithfulness, not your feelings. The only way to anchor your faith, is to plant it firmly in the Word of God. Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the Word of God {Romans 10:17}.

2-Minute Video on this: https://www.facebook.com/DrDeeKnight/posts/10154838368521492

The Attack Is Proof of the Promise

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Scammers intrigue me, and here’s why: two things, first, nobody runs scams on people with nothing worth taking. Maybe you’ve heard it said before that thieves don’t rob an empty vault, but truly, if someone is running a scam on you, then you must have something worth their effort. The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy… {Jhn. 10:10, NIV}. That means there’s SOMETHING you have that’s worth stealing, something yet alive he wants to kill, and some hope you’ve clung to that hasn’t been destroyed.

Secondly, scammers aren’t committing robberies or burglaries, even. The scammer’s goal, your enemy’s goal, is to get you to give up by CHOICE, something he CANNOT take by force! He cannot wrestle the victory from your hands, but he CAN deceive you into releasing your grasp on everything God’s promised you.

For example, one of the ways God uses me is to bring healing to others, and any time He’s up to something new or what seems big to me, my health and personal healing is attacked. I believe the enemy attacks us in the areas God most intends to use us for His glory, so if you’re feeling attacked in any area, know there is a correlating promise the enemy wants you to give up on because he cannot take it from you; he can only get you to release your grasp.

So, my encouragement to you is this: anchor yourself in the Word. Resolve that your faith will be unmoved by the winds that blow, because the winds will blow. The enemy wants you to believe God’s promises are not for you, but instead of believing that, repeat God’s promises aloud, make your mouth tell your mind that every thought will now be captive to the obedience of Christ! Boss your feelings around and show the facts who’s boss in your life. Your enemy’s attack is proof of God’s promises for you; don’t forfeit the victory that’s already yours!

1.5 minute Video: https://www.facebook.com/DrDeeKnight/posts/10154813778356492